Power Girl: You Be the Judge!

It's no secret that I'm a Power Girl fan. I have been since I first saw her guest-star in Peter David's 1990s Supergirl series. I can't remember the issue number (my sister has it somewhere), but it was cute and funny. I remember Power Girl lifting a truck or something at the end of one issue, and then helping out in the second. There was a joke about pointy sticks. There was one point where she told Linda (this was the Linda Danvers Supergirl) she had an idea, and it cut to a panel of both women bracing their shoulders against a spaceship or a flying city or something like that. I just remember it looming over them, Linda asking "Now what?" and Karen remarking "Unfortunately, here endeth the plan."

I liked her immediately. She was an older, gutsier version of Supergirl. Unfortunately, she was appearing only Sovereign Seven and I had no money (and my sister wasn't shelling out for that series), so I didn't get to see her in action for a while (I wasn't disappointed when I did). In the meantime, I did search online, and found a scan of her first appearance somewhere. She earned my Eternal Fanitude right there.

Of course there's more!

She was just what a teenaged girl living in our society would want to grow up like. Beautiful and alluring (Everybody by that age wants to be pretty) by the traditional standards, but uncompromising, brave, superstrong, supertough, respected by all the old men around her, and able to fly. I'd even go so far as to suggest that Power Girl is why the fear of feminism thing never took hold of me as a teenager.

I like how she was classy, brassy, and outspoken. Her easy banter with some of the guys and her complete lack of fear in drawing the line when it came to sexism. It's tough in a mostly male workplace. You always wonder if they don't trust you to do the job because you're newer than them or because you're a woman. You don't want a hostile workplace, so you let things slide that really do bug you. I loved how she just showed up and laid down the law. It was awe-inspiring.

And yes, her character design did help. At least, Wally Wood's original Power Girl design did. She's busty, slightly chunky (as comic book ladies go), and straight-backed. She stood like Superman. She was definately feminine, though. Her hair and eyes had the softness, and she was shaped that way. (And before you start in on me for liking traditionally feminine characteristics, I'm going to tell you right here I'm well aware of the unrealistic appearance and bullshit beauty standards modern society shoves down our throats and I know that that's what's affecting my assetment. Awareness of this influence, knowing why I like it, just doesn't change the fact that I like the character design). To me, the hole in the chest-fabric worked much better than the simply white costume, because of her body type. With the little window, I get the impresson of a bra.

I get that impression because yes, I'm busty (and somewhat chunky in belly area), a bit topheavy so to speak. Power Girl is probably the ideal for my body type and I like how she looks with the little window costume. Especially the new design (I think Amanda Conners came up with it) with the visible seams on the outfit. It looks like a sports bra to me. And because it's so obviously not spandex, and because of the way the cleavage shows up in the little window, I know that she's wearing an underwire with very tough fabric and a racerback -- the same sort of bra I don't feel comfortable unless I'm wearing. So, yeah, there's a little self-projection here.

I don't think that's all there is to her, but I do think her appearance, like any well-designed comic book character, emphasizes her personality.

Anyway, I've been following the recent round of posts set off by Savage Erik Larsen (No, I'm not telling you where I got that) and found two that stood out to me. One included Redlib's latest anti-Power Girl jibe, which put me in the mood to defend her, and the other was the one Kalinara posted on Power Girl while I was in Mississippi, where one of the comments caught my attention.

"I dunno, maybe you need to talk to more women. :) The thing I dislike was that Wally Wood (I think it was him) deliberately drew her breasts bigger in each succeeding issue just to see if anyone would notice. He was basically taunting editors (and of course completely ignoring even the possibility of female readers). PG's breasts started out as an ARTIST IN-JOKE. I dunno about you but I find that kind of offensive on its face."

Ignoring the first sentence (which actually kind of offends me), we see a rumor I've seen pasted all over the internet, but never seen confirmed. Mr Wood is no longer with us, so everything we really have is second-hand. I asked Cronin over at CSBG to look into it, but he hasn't gotten around to it.

Well, to paraphrase my mother, if you want something done right, do it your own damned self. I've gotten my hands on a few back issues of All-Star Comics form the 70s, and of course there are scans of Power Girl's first appearance all over the internet. In effect, I have samples of artwork from all five issues of All-Star Comics that had Wally Wood drawing Power Girl. I selected the clearest full frontal body shot of Power Girl seen in each issue, and have posted them here for comparison. If you don't believe me DC is collecting these issues into a trade paperback in August.

So anyway, without further ado, I bring you...

The Power Girl Breastrospective

(All-Star Comics #58)

(All-Star Comics #59)

(All-Star Comics #60)

(All-Star Comics #61)

(All-Star Comics #62)

(All-Star Comics #63)

(All-Star Comics #64)

(All-Star Comics #65)
(I needed to tilt this one on its side.)

(Once again, the term "Breastrospective" courtesy Chris Sims)

It was particularly annoying in 60, 62, and 65 where she seemed to be at an angle everywhere, but I did the best I could. I think we have enough data. What do you guys think of the Wally Wood legend? Fact or Fiction?

Two Women Discuss Food and Fashion

"Hey, Diana, I thought you were a vegetarian!"

Wonder Woman looks up from her snack to see Power Girl approaching.

"Hi Karen!"

"Is that beef jerky?" Karen asks.

"No, it's venison," Diana takes a bite and offers it to the others. Karen accepts, but still raises a questioning eyebrow

"No," Diana answers, "I'm not a vegetarian. My cook is. I respect his personal reasons for being so and eat what he makes, but I have nothing personaly against eating meat."

"Isn't that a conflict with your nature-beliefs and animal rights stance?"

"Not at all. Lady Artemis' primary office is Chief Hunter, Lord Hermes is the patron of livestock farmers, and I've been recieved more from them than I can repay. It would be a spiritual betrayal, for me personally, to swear off meat when I benefit from their patronage. This doesn't mean I condone unnecessary cruelty, but I don't find nutrition cruelty, just how it may be collected. This venison, for example, was freeze-dried and given to me by a hunter friend from a deer she personally killed during the allowed season."

"Still seems like a conflict to me," Karen says, "but then a lot of things with you are contradictory."

"Not to me they aren't. As I'm sure things that seem natural to you may seem contradictory to others" Diana indicates the window over Power Girl's cleavage.

"Look who's talking!"

"This outfit was considered acceptable by my culture. Themiscyra is a very warm climate, and I had no need for extensive armor with my gift from Demeter. You chose your costume well aware of what the Patriarch's World would think of you. I'm not condemning you at all, but I am curious as to why."

"It's a distraction tactic."

Diana raises an eyebrow. Karen frowns, she should have known better than to try and bullshit Wonder Woman.

"I was going to put a symbol there, like Superman's..."

"Then why not leave it blank?

Karen tosses her head, ill at ease. This is embarassing.

"I have a nice body, I'm proud of that. I wanted to show off a little."

"What's wrong with that?"

"Nothing!"

"Then why try to cover it with another explanation?"

"Because guys don't understand, damn it. They see the window and the boobs and think 'That's it. That's Power Girl.' And if I complain, they say 'Well, you're showing yourself off. You want this kind of attention.' Which is wrong, I want to be sexy and lively and beautiful, but I'm still a person, y'know. I don't want to be reduced to these."

"Makes sense. A little in this society tends to turn into a lot. Some people see a little bit of skin and consider it a complete nullification of humanity. They can't see past the sexuality and see that it's just a part of an entire person, and so a little sensuality gets seized upon as a 'distinguishing characteristic' and even the entire identity of a woman. The emphasis on sexuality increases, and soon the whole woman is lost in this hideous caricature of femininity. They're not a fully realized person to the observer, they're just a fantasy, or a joke. I can see why women in this society would tend to hide themselves in the attempt to minimize this."

"I've tried that," Karen states sullenly, "more covering costumes, frowning and scowling all the time. It didn't feel like me!"


"Of course not! You're lively and bawdy and it's wonderful. You remind me of my mother sometimes."

"Now, you mother was fun," Karen grins momentarily, remembering the Amazon Queen, "But she had the same problem. It pissed her off, too."

"And she resisted both sides of the argument. She resisted the people who tried to define her as little more than a pair of breasts, and the people who tried to cover her up because they believed that definition. And in the end, how do you remember her?"

"As a wise, lively, brassy woman," Karen says after some thought, "Who found the same fun and excitement saving the world as dancing at the victory party."

Diana smiles widely.

"But not everyone remembers her that way."

"I'm ever an optimist, Karen, those are the ones who never met her. And I have to believe that more people remember her for the good deeds she did than the pin-ups she posed for. I also have to believe that more people will remember you for saving the world than for baring part of your bust."

"You are so naive," Karen replies affectionately.

"Still, are you going to sew up the hole in your costume?"

"Are you going to drop the deer jerky?"

"Fair enough. Let's find something to do."

"Or someone to hit."

Is it June yet?

(Via Newsarama)

The Flash is Starting to Scare Me V

(Redlib is going to love this one)



Wait for it... Waaait for it...

Phantom Lady Breastrospective

(Thanks to Chris Sims for coining the term Breastrospective)

Enter the Hall of Objectification, If You Dare!!!

I'm sure you all remember the Monstrosity pictured below, where we all discovered that artist Daniel Acuna had no idea what a real woman looked like. It caused quite a stink.



Freedom Fighters #1 (as previewed on Newsarama), is not quite so bad, but still -- They're very round, bouncy and shiny, aren't they?



Granted, Grant Morrison created this lastest incarnation, there may yet be a reason for her appearance. Maybe's she's a plastic person like we saw in Seven Soldiers: Mr. Miracle. That would be fun. If that's the case, I may give the series a shot despite disliking Acuna's art (as so many of his people look plastic) even though it's not actually Morrison writing.

Nevertheless, I still find them freaky. In all of my comics-reading time, I don't think I've ever seen anything so freaky. The freakiest thing, however, is that people find them necessary to the character.

For example, the inimitable Erik Larsen seems to believe that "Phantom Lady's whole claim to fame was looking like a porn star with her impossibly perky Triple-D breasts as the star attractions to her book."


Later in the same article, he asserts "The Phantom Lady's only distinguishing characteristics are her ample cans. That's pretty much all she has going for her. Ditto Power Girl. To tone them down is to strip them of their identities." (Emphasis Mine)

Wow, all the years I've been following these characters and I've before never realized that the only likeable thing about them is their breasts. I guess Power Girl's brassy attitude, unapologetic honesty and feminist aspirations were fabricated by my own sick imagination. And here I didn't realize that there were dozens of women running around with invisibility powers, a Golden Age legacy, a socialite background, in a political backdrop with a patriotic superteam and the only thing that distinguished our Phantom Lady was her humongous bazongas! Thank you, Mr Larsen, for enlightening this foolishly idealistic woman!

I'd have to say that the above quotes are what really pissed me off about Larsen's column. The assumption that neither character had a personality or a usefulness to the story, and that without hooters to ogle they would be a pointless addition to the cast.


Sadly, he was not smart enough to shut up after that stunningly idiotic statement. He continues to insist "And frankly, that's what they're supposed to look like! It's not a situation where an artist took Catwoman and distorted her to fit his fetishes -- these characters started out busty as all hell -- drawing them that way is drawing them right. If you don't want the Barbi twins to look like the Barbi twins, don't use the Barbi twins."

Really? Phantom Lady is supposed to look like that? With such massive mammaries that her head is dwarfed by them?

I beg demand to differ. I've seen this image on a number of pages, including her profile on the International Catalogue of Superheroes website. It's one of her earliest appearances in Police Comics.



And here, from her own series, the cover to Phantom Lady #2.



Her Silver Age costume, with the added window for a convenient peek at the cleavage, as seen in Justice League of America #107.



Oh course, the most incriminating picture I've found, after the Peek-A-Boo window morphed into the Dental Floss-tume, still features a woman with human proportions, albeit human proportions on display.



And finally, a peek inside Action Comics Weekly #640 for a little more perspective, see the Dog's Paw vs. the Breast in question?



Looks like Larsen's Beloved Twins are a more recent addition than previously believed.

A Short Note to a Stupid Columnist

Dear Erik Larsen,

I sadly regret to inform you that your latest column is based on overreaction and an apparent inability to accept criticism. Questioning how a female character's bra size adds to the story does not amount to censorship. Yes, comic book writers, artists and publishers have every right to design their characters how they see fit. I have yet to hear any feminists calling for legal restrictions on the cup size of fictional characters. I am also well aware of the existence of big breasted women, and small waisted women, and women of any size and shape possible.

However, as consumers we have the right to examine the product that we are buying. We have the right to question the value of superfluous physical traits, and we have the right to question the motives of the creators who designed those physical traits. We also have the right to spread our findings to other consumers, so that they may consider them when making purchases.

Sincerely,
A Rabid Feminist

Wonder Woman Preview Art

I was worried when they announced the Wonder Woman relaunch artist. I've seen Dodson's other work, Harley Quinn, Poison Ivy, Black Cat... All pinup girls. All the same body type, all the same face. Another cheesecake artist on Wonder Woman. Same old objectification and disrespect, shameless pandering to adolescent boys, and "sex sells" mentality. Seeing the cover in June's solicits relieved some of my fears. I was aware now that he could draw a different body type. But still, the poses, the potential for disrespect, the possible clothing... There was so much that could go wrong.

So when Melchior linked to the Terry Doson interview on Newsarama, I waited until I was ready to read his post and the interview. Of course, I went through and looked at the preview pages first.



May I draw your attention to the fourth panel? Here, let me isolate it.



Did you recognize those breasts?

No?

Well, I'm not surprised, seeing as they are actually covered by the Wonder Woman emblem for once.

I daresay we can set our anxieties aside for now.

Maybe it's Just Me This Time

(I'm just posting this to see if anyone else had the same first thought I did)

Behind the Blog

Tonight, an exclusive look into how Chris Sims of the Invincible Super-Blog tests his jokes...

Chris: Hrm. Is it wrong to refer to Freedom Ring as "Marvel's newest and gayest action hero?"
Ragnell: *Thinks carefully* Nah
Chris: Darn. Then I'm not trying hard enough. *Pause* What if I go with "sodomite"...
Ragnell: Ack!!
Chris: There we go!

Linkblogging

I was putting off the linkblogging until I had a chance to read through everything, but it'll be a while. In the meantime, here's some intensive reading:

While I was out, I missed a few theme days:
Blog Against Disablism Day
Blog Against Heteronormativity Day
Blog To Raise Awareness About Sexual Violence Day


I missed a lot of Frank Miller hate and male objectification, both of which I greatly would have enjoyed participating in. T

I missed the Carnival of Feminists 13 but on the bright side, I made it back just in time to send my Making Assumptions post to Carnival of Feminists 14. 14's up right now, check it out (MetroKitty and the post about objectifying men made it too). Next one's at Self-Portraits if anyone's up for it.

Enjoy!

Girls and Green Lantern in Infinite Crisis

Why yes, I did get the Jim Lee cover.

Aside from the obvious goodies featured in this cover (Mmmm... Green Lantern Uniform Pants...), I want you to note 3 things here.

1) G'nort.

2) Wolverine.

3) This orange person.

Hmm... Shaped like and Hourglass, Bare Midriff, what appears to be Breasts... That looks like a woman.

Holy Cats! They let wimmens in the Green Lantern Corps? Who knew?

Yes, There's MoreMild Infinite Crisis #7 Spoilers Below (But you'll barely notice them)

Seriously, I was a little disappointed at the end of Green Lantern Corps: Recharge Remember that big spread with everyone in the Corps by the Central Power Battery on it, the one that had Elvis?

I looked carefully. There were three females -- Brik, Soranik, and this unidentified woman.

And I can hear it now. But Raaaaagnuuulll, they're aaaaaliens! They won't have the same sex characteristics as humans. A lot of those people could be female, and you just can't see it.

Okay, well, then, explain Brik. Brik is a rock-type person, from one of two stone-races on the planet Dryad. She is not an animal, she is a mineral. See the blocky shape and the gray coloring. That is how the artist indicates this.

So why the hell does she have breasts?

Easy, so that we know that she's a female.

You see, in our society, for reasons that remain a mystery to me, males are considered the default. If you see a person who is not obviously female (Breasts, Long Hair, Hourglass Shape, Pink Accessories of some sort are various ways of indicating this) then they are assumed to be male. In a book like Green Lantern Corps, where there is an unnamed background cast of 7200, all you have to go on is visual clues is for most of them. Even being generous, and not making assumptions, there's still a number of humanoid races. These can be obviously male or obviously female. In my experience, most have been obviously male. Male is likely the default to the writers and artists, otherwise why bother to give a rock creature a D-Cup Rack to emphasize her femininity?

This gives us three gender options when looking at the background of Green Lantern stories. 1) Male-Shaped, 2) Female-Shaped, and 3) Funky Alien-Shaped (Assumed to be Male by Default).

I got into a big argument on Comic-Bloc about this one. (And I remember who with this time, his name is associated with Hector Hammond, prison, and showers) All I said was "I'm disappointed we didn't get more new female Green Lanterns during Recharge." I mean, that's an opinion. How can you argue an opinion? I should have known better with Green Lantern fans. We can argue about anything.

It didn't get violent, to our credit. But we did end up listing all of the new Green Lanterns who had lines in the miniseries and the regular series. All of the returned vets. All of the projected returning vets in the upcoming Green Lantern arc (that starts this month). And then working out the ratios. We decided that the Golden Age magic Lanterns shouldn't count. We came up with 5 to 20, a 1:4 ratio, which we estimated to be near what the active duty military gender ratio is. Still, I figure, with Green Lantern, where the concept is warriors chosen specifically on strength of will, the gender ratio should be closer to 1:1, which led to the actual argument. Hammond's bath-giver told me I was putting my hopes too high and we'd never see that. He seemed to find this unreasonable. I didn't. Eventually we started talking about Raker or G'nort and peace came to the Green Lantern chatroom once again.

It weighed on my mind afterwards, so I decided to re-tally it. Going by speaking parts and named people.

Established Male/Male-Shaped/Masculine Characteristics
Hal Jordan
John Stewart
Kyle Rayner
Guy Gardner
Salakk
Kilowog
Shorm
Stel
Green Man
Torquemada
Isamot Kol
Vath Sarn
Mogo (although assigning gender to a sentient planet makes no sense to me, they refer to Mogo as "He")

Xudarian Male (GL#4)
H'lvenese Apparently Male (GL#4, GLC:R#1, GLC:R#5)
Goblin Female's Rocky Apparently Male Partner (GL#6)
Injured Primate Apparent Male (GLC:R#5)

3 Injured Masculine-Appearing Humanoids (GLC:R#5)


Established Female/Female Shaped
Brik
Soranik Natu
Goblin Apprently Female (GL#6)

This gives us a 3:20 Female:Male ratio. 13% Female.

Foreshadowed in Green Lantern #3
Male
Graf Toren
Hannu
Jack T. Chance
Ke'Hann
Kreon
Tomar-Tu

Female
Boodikka
Laira

5:26 now. Roughly 24% Female. A little better, but still not at the 50% it should be at.

So, why did I feel a need to do this? Well, because of the crowdscenes in GLC: Recharge. Aside from the two named Females (Soranik and Brik), I saw two other apparent females in the crowdscenes.

In the Crowdscenes:
Apparently Butterfly-type Female (GLC:R#2 Morning Briefing)
Female with the Funky Hat (GL:R#5 Crowdscene)



The rest were all either Male-Shaped or Funky-Alien Shaped and therefore assumed as male by default. It must be the default again, because why else give Brik Bouncy Breasts?

In light of the recent Green Lantern resurrections (Hal, Kilowog), and who had not been resurrected (Katma, Arisia), these background problems jumped out at me. Green Lantern is my favorite franchise you see, and I found it immensely annoying when the only prominent female is there not because she is chosen (like virtually every male character there, now that Johns has retconned out the randomness) for her courage and honesty, but because she was born into the business. In fact, because the heroes in this book are specifically chosen for courage and honesty, I think its even more important to have visible female characters here than in other superhero franchises. All men and no women in this mess sends me a message I am sick of hearing.



This was downright annoying me until I read Infinite Crisis #7 today. From the point where I saw the Lady pictured above, this issue could do no wrong. Inside the issue, when they have the first panel showing the Corps, there are at least four very obviously female characters there. There's more as the book continues. Quite a few, actually. Enough that I still don't feel the need to count and figure out the percentages (maybe later).

Even now, I find myself incapable of giving an objective review, overwhelmed by the pure joy of finally seeing some gender-diversity in my favorite franchise.

Even if background characters are cannon-fodder, it's still pretty damned cool to see a decent number of women there.

Levitz Got Something Right...

Mild JSA #85 spoilers

I'm still mad about his earlier portrayal of Dr. Midnite.

But I have to say, the Glowing Green Ghost of Jade who guest-starred in this issue was more likeable than I've ever seen Jade.

Maybe I'm just getting soft lately.

Got a Laugh Out of This

Minor Supergirl #6 Spoilers

I read Supergirl #6 and one of my hopes was dashed. The 16-year-old girl is still being heavily sexualized.

To think those cover costumes had given me heart.

However, the art is much more reasonable -- if still cheesecakey -- and the writing is infinitely better now. We're not universally expected to like her, but to understand that she's a hotheaded teenager and that's not a positive trait. As such, I like her a lot better. Rucka does indeed have skill.

And I did get a laugh from this issue.

You know how, even when the solicits have revealed something like a mystery identity or someone's death months in advance they still treat it as a surprise in the actual book? So, even when we know who Nightwing (Wow, yet another Nightwing in the DCU!) in Kandor is, they'll still have a big reveal where she shows up, is mysteriously clad in the uniform for a page or two and her identity is then revealed in a surprise manner.

Which we got, below:



Did you recognize those breasts?

A full page before they show her face, and it serves to identify Power Girl.

I laughed for ten minutes.

Had to Share

Chris worked this banner up for me a few weeks ago. He based it on a story he reviewed for Prism Comics here.

(Do I really come off as this militant?)

Who's Responsible?

All right, who did this?



Who put that poor confused boy in a gray body suit and then gave him a yellow cape?

Dick Dillon was the penciller, but I'm not sure he's responsible for the design.

Was it Kirby? It was a crime what Kirby did to Sandman. Did he do this to Robin?

Or maybe Wally Wood. I think the guy who'd take DC's personification of seventies feminism and put a huge hole in the chest of her costume in her character design is capable of anything.

Neal Adams was the cover artist here. I saw the atrocity he put the Earth-1 Robin in, I wouldn't put this past him.

Whoever did it, it was cruel beyond measure and they should be ashamed of themselves.

May Second

Rambling, not really comic-related and a bit depressingMy calendar was still on April, so one of the first things I did when I woke up was flip the page. I stared at today's date. Yesterday was May Day, or Beltane for the Celtic Reconstructionists. It was listed as the submission deadline for the next Carnival of Feminists. Cinco De Mayo is on Friday. I go back to work on Thursday. There's a party on the Thirteenth that I'm not sure I'll go to attend. The thirteenth is a Buddhist Holiday called Wesak, which I know absolutely nothing about. Mother's Day is on the Fourteenth -- Don't want to forget again this year. The Twenty-fifth is listed as Ascension (Christian) which I imagine means forty days since Easter. There's two US Federal Holidays (Armed Forces Day and Memorial Day) and Victoria Day on the twenty-second for Canada.

It's too hot in my apartment, a high in the 80s in Oklahoma City. I'd left the Argonaut off, because the cat's sick. He's wheezing and sneezing while I'm coughing and blowing my nose like a foghorn. The climate change always gets me when I travel. It's 70 degrees in Eden today when they bury my grandfather.

I couldn't get a flight. There's information at the bottom of the calendar about the symbolism of doves. It makes me glance at May's picture. A circle, an inscription in seven different languages on the boarder, containing three circles that each contain three spirals with three doves with beaks in the center. The knotwork points towards the center, three images converge.

My apartment's too messy. No one in my family lives in this kind of a mess. Grandpa's children live across the country. New York, Pennsylvania, New Jersey, Virginia, Texas, California -- they're all in New York today for the funeral. I think I'm missing something important. My brother tried to get ahold of me, I was driving back from Mississippi. The landscape is dark and moody, with twisted trees and dark forests. There's still hurricane damage It rained on the way home, gray skies over Oklahoma. It was the third time I'd been to school in Mississippi (My USAF training was there) and the third time a relative died while I was there. I don't think I'll be going back to the Gulf Coast. Patterns.

The flights out of Oklahoma City were booked up, but I took a few days off. I need to clean, even my keyboard's dusty. I still have presents from December I haven't mailed, and souvenirs from Las Vegas and now Peach Syrup from the drive to Georgia for Mom. I can't find my the Harry Chapin CD with Corey's Coming on it. Junk Mail is piling up. I haven't sorted my new comics in half a year now. So, naturally, I found myself on the computer the last few days. A little escapism.

Things keep converging. My Aunt from New York commented on the Italian rant. She's from the Irish side of the family, and a few comments above they talk about the O'Dares being stereotyped. I never had a problem with them, does that mean I connect more with my father's side of the family than my mother's? Or is it just that there's more Irish-American in the South and less Italian-American? The stereotype seems less harmful because it's more normal to be Irish. It didn't make me think "They're making fun of me." Didn't make me think "They really believe it." I used to argue, when I was stationed in Texas, with Aunt Marilee about vermicelli pasta.

"It's in the Ethnic Foods section."

"It's not an Ethnic food. Everybody eats it."

"It's Italian, Italian's Ethnic."

"It's not! Italian's normal."

Did I really think like that?

This isn't making any sense. Grandpa died, I'm thinking about me. I never make the funeral. I was too young when Grandma died. When my grandmother on the Italian side died, I was on the plane when they buried her. I sometimes don't get told until after the funeral.

The whole thing looks like the picture. Incongruous when it's supposed to be a continuous, repeating pattern that you can see spiraling in, but it's disconnected because these little spirals are separated by bright, off-setting blue paint that keep them from blending into the picture properly, the knotwork is trying to make it to the rest of the picture, it points in towards the center but is isolated to little icicles hugging the border where is completely disconnected from everything trapping the awkward, misshapen doves who try to touch beaks in a wreath. There's nothing in the center. There should be something in the center, not empty blue.

I think I'm missing something important.

The cat's sick, he's trying to sit behind me and clean himself in the computer chair and I should give him his medicine. I'm going back to work soon. I need to take my dry cleaning but I don't feel like it. I think I'll order in. Mazzio's delivers.

I'll post something funny later.

The Flash is Starting to Scare Me IV

I found this blurred and aged panel flipping not through the pages of a Lovecraft adaptation, the comic book version of Children of the Corn or some other horror movie, or even a PSA announcement on the dangers of cults.

No, this image was in DC Super Stars #5. The redheaded child is Wally West, better known in those days as the teenaged sidekick fo the Flash -- Kid Flash.

Doomed Before the First Issue Shipped

While I was away, Kalinara had some ideas for redeeming Jade (and I have to say I liked some fo them. The conversation really got fun in the comments when they started to reimagine her as a Fairy-Tale Princess Adventurer. After reading it, I'm still not fond of her personality, but I will admit to wanting a Green Barbie now.

Anyway, a few weeks ago I found something on Fortress of Fortitude (finally found the original post, I'd mixed it up with another blog wtih a similar template) that convinced me that Jade was doomed from conception. I don't even mean the mother/daughter symbolism I'm always harping on. No, I mean the very attitude that DC had when they first marketed spelled "Weak Character."


Please note how everyone else is notable because of their really cool and useful powers or talents, and Jade is notable for "Green Skin."

They couldn't say "Energy Manipulation," "Power Pulse," "Light Powers" or "Green Light" -- they went with "Green Skin."

If Brainiac 5 or another Coluan character were featured in an ad like this, we all know it would say "Super Intelligence" or something like that.

If Alan Scott, or Hal Jordan, or John or Guy or Kyle or Katman or Kilowog or freaking Saakk were in this, it would say "Power Ring" or something referring to the energy.

If She-Hulk, the goddess of cheesecake, were a DC character and she were featured in this ad, it would say something about her enhanced strength or toughness.

But since it's Jade, it says "Green Skin."

I'd feel bad for her, if she hadn't made a habit of wasting the coolest powers known to comicdom.

Making Assumptions

Store owners and clerks take note, because nothing cheeses me off more than this.

I walked into a store in Georgia. I got a few of what I call "It's a stranger" stares, and no one said a word.

Behind me are the two men who rode with me to the store, Joe and Max. The man behind the counter greets them as they walk in together. After we left the store, I asked Joe if he'd ever been in the store before. It was possible, though I sincerely doubted it because a) he'd driven us to two other now closed stores before this one, b) Joe reads very little that isn't Manga and there wasn't any Manga or Anime there, and c) the comics Joe does read are the ones I buy, think are cool, and send him for his birthday or Christmas.

"Not for a few months," he replies. So I ask him why I wasn't greeted and he verifies my suspicions about the clerk. I actually felt better, because I'd almost walked right out.

Because it's the only store in the town and I insisted on visiting here in my neverending search for back issues, I actually did bother to take a look at the boxes, though. I find a few from the seventies but almost put them down because I'm pissed off that he greeted Joe and not me. Then I see them.

Quarter bins.

There aren't many quarter bins in Oklahoma City, you understand.

There are even fewer I haven't already picked through on Saturday afternoons.

I couldn't just pass them by. I was in town for a single day to visit Joe. We had to be back the next day to get ready for class. There were six quarter bins.

I looked through the first one. Volume 2 Starmans, written by James Robinson, in good condition, for a quarter. Five for a dollar! They cost two-fifty back in Oklahoma! Clearly the owner was insane and I needed to take advantage of this. When I walked back to the register, with nearly sixteen dollars worth of project, I found Joe and Max sitting by the door, looking very bored. They hadn't bought a thing and had found nothing to chat with the clerk about. While the clerk, who was actually a fairly nice person who I hope will know better than to make assumptions next time around, rang up my purchases, Max made the joke.

"Excuse me?" I asked.

"I said, some women shop for shoes, some women shop for clothes..."

I look at my watch and rolled my eyes. Forty minutes for picking through six full long-boxes. That was not bad at all and I don't know a male comic book fan who wouldn't do it either. I said so.

They bitched about the time. I politely reminded them that they had spent longer in the video game store, which I had no interest in, the night before. They pointed out that I had spent my time looking for Lovecraft games and making fun of the Tomb Raider intro (it's actually pretty funny, she seems to realize that guys are staring at her breasts and fidgets nervously) they were showing.

Like they couldn't have made the most of being in the comic book store. But no, they only like Manga!

That's when I made the decision. Back in Mississippi there was a comic book store that was a close walk to our hotel, twenty minutes, thirty at Max's horrificly slow shuffle. There was another store ten minutes (fifteen by Max's pacing) beyond that that I hadn't felt a need to visit. Well, suddenly I did. My passive-aggressive vindictive energy was now focused on marching his sexist ass to that store and back. Sure, he could have said no, but that would have meant he had to stay home alone all night and study. He was going to have to do that after I left Friday. So on Wednesday, Max agreed to go.

He whined the whole damned way there, and dragged his feet.

Then he humiliated me by reading the product off the shelves.

But it was worth it. There were no quarter bins, but there were dollar back-issues. From the seventies. I loaded up, and headed home with whiny guy in tow.

I did get more than vengeance out of the walk, though. One of the dollar-issues I found contained the three most awesome Power Girl Panels I have ever seen. You see, I'm a King Arthur buff. I think medieval clothes look cool. Swordfighting is fun to watch, and horseback-riding has a charm cars just can't replace. I'd never live in Arthurian times, though. Because I'm not just a casual movie-goer, or a TH White (short for White-wash) reader. I'm an obsessive researcher of Arthurian Lore -- particularly the grim and gritty pre-Malory legends. I have had periods where I've thrown all of the intense fervor currently directed into Green Lantern fandom into King Arthur Stories (especially the ones about Gawain, my favorite knight) or Sherlock Holmes pastiches. As such, I'm well-acquainted with the odious rules of chivalry, particularly the ones about ladies left alone. Much as I love these legends, there are days when I really wished Morgan Le Fey would just up and kick all of their asses for their rampant stupidity regarding women.

Which brings me to Power Girl.





Anyway, my point is that I really, really love Power Girl.

Oh, and that you should greet both genders of customers when they walk into the store, whether you think they'll buy or not because stereotypes are utter bullshit.

Green Lanterns

Green Lantern fans have a reputation for rabidity. The infamous Hal Jordan fans vs. Kyle Rayner fans feud raged for well over a decade. The writer of the issues where Kyle replaced Hal recieved death threats and still gets regularly trashed by the most extreme readers. The writer who wrote Rebirth gets similarly trashed by Kyle fans now. Before Hal came back, we had little Kyle fan vs. John Stewart fan fights on message boards and even now, with three series and five major Lanterns there's still little skirmishes on the internet.

Why? What inspires such fierce fan loyalty?

It's really very simple actually. Green Lanterns are like us.

And I don't mean regular-joe type characters. The traditional appeal where the fans viacariously get the power of instant wish fulfillment. No, that's obvious.

They are like us because each one, no matter the species or gender, is a geek, a dweeb, or a nerd.

Kyle's dweebiosity is well documented every Wednesday on Seven Hells.

Guy Gardner broke up with a girl over an argument about 2001: A Space Odyssey.

John Stewart reputedly listens to Abba and Barabara Streisand. I've never seen this, but multiple people have stated it so I'll take their word for it. He's also an architect, which is a reasonably nerdy job.

In her first appearance, Katma Tui built a machine specifically to measure the amount of love she felt for her boyfriend before she accepted his marriage proposal.

And then, there's Hal Jordan. Hal's test pilot on fight jets, he has no trouble getting an overnight dance partner when his girlfriend turns into a naughty supervillainess, he gets to just punch out whoever disagrees with him without every getting assault charges or a broken wrist. Hal was never a dweeb, right?

Well, here's Hal reminiscing about his childhood: