Sunday, September 02, 2007


Since I've been ranting about reactions to Amazons Attack, I may as well link one that made me laugh: Ragtime's Things I learned from Amazons Attack.

On #7: I would like to point out that through DC's shifting timeline Donna would be in the earliest part of the ADD generation (I really think we should just toss out the letter thing and do generations by most-commonly diagnosed childhood ailment anymore), and she was looking for Diana when Jason Todd showed up in a sidepanel. The next thing we all knew, she was hopping universes in Countdown.

So yeah, she got distracted and forgot about the war.

I wonder if the same thing'll happen to Kyle. The first Countdown Presents: The Search for Ray Palmer one-shot is due out this month, and the Sinestro Corps War crossover is not finished until December.

Can anyone else picture it? Kylelax raises his arm to throw an energy burst at a downed Hal, when just beyond his victim he sees an old girlfriend (and two other guys) appear out of nowhere.

"Hey Kyle! I found this guy who's taking us to alternate universes! We're looking for Professor Palmer! Wanna come?"

"Sure!" Kyle simply walks over to them, leaving a very confused giant yellow fearbug (from outer spaaace) where he was first standing. "Can we stop for coffee on the way?"

"Okay! He was just telling us about a universe where the guy who started up Starbucks is the Emperor of North America when I thought of you, actually..."

"Really? Do they still have the coffee bars there?"

"On every street corner," the Monitor assures him.

They disappear. Parallax is temporarily disabled because it just can't understand how it lost hold of that host. The other human host had had a normal attention span.

Unfortunately everyone else is also stunned by this turn of events for a combat round or two, so no advantage comes of it.

Its a good thing I'm not writing Sinestro Corps, isn't it?


  1. Ooh! I like it! But, I think, to tie it all back together, wouldn't new semi-evil Circe-souled Hippolyta make a great new host for Parallax after Kyle leaves?

    Then, after several years, they can bring her back "for real" by having a big three-way interior monologue (Hippolyta/Circe/Parallax) like Hal/Spectre/Parallax did.

    I'd call it "Amazons: Regirded."

  2. I'm still trying to figure out how the hell Donna Troy knows who Jason Todd is... much less why Donna would leave the search for Diana on his authority that something weird and cosmic is going on...

  3. You know, it makes perfect sense the way that you write it. Parallax did indeed pick the wrong soul to with the tiniest attention span in the galaxy!

    The next Kyle action figure should come with a tiny Starbucks cup in his hand.

  4. Ragnell--

    Will you please accept the nomination for Mayor of all Comic Books?

    You get a sash...

  5. I can't wait for the next Kyle/Donna/Jason/Bob one-shot:
    "The Search for Ray Pal...Hey, Let's Go Ride Our Bikes!".

  6. I think your version has more merit than you give it credit for.